For God so loved the world...

I grew up in church, attending and participating in Easter services since I was 3 months old and I haven’t missed a single one since.  I’ve heard the Resurrection story and taken communion more times than I can count.  I could quote John 3:16 by the time I was 4 years old. I gave my life to Christ when I was 7 but it took 15 years for me to fully understand what that meant and to completely comprehend how vast and incomprehensible God’s love is for me.  And yet, I have never been as overwhelmed and speechless at the thought of God’s love as I am right now as the Easter season begins yet again. 

Whether it’s because it is my first Easter away from home, the heavy atmosphere of Holy Week that is spread all across the Philippines, where I am in my walk with Christ right now or a combination of the 3, I’m not sure. But over the past couple weeks, I have sat in total awe and wonder that not only could someone love such a horrible sinner like me that He would send His only son to die a cruel and awful death for MY redemption and to pay the price of MY sin; but that He would call me to do something as great as telling others about that very love and sacrifice.  And it’s at that moment that the only words my mouth can utter is, “I can’t believe I get to do this!”

 I know I say that a lot but really, think about it.  He could’ve sent anyone, chosen anybody to do what I do everyday.  I’m inadequate, I don’t have the right skills or experience for this job, I’m not a fabulous speaker or writer, I’ve screwed up more times than anyone knows, I battle my selfish tendencies every day, I doubt God and the fact that He knows what’s best for me…nothing about me says that I should be here loving on these amazing girls and showing God’s love like this…NOTHING! But for all of my inadequacies, God makes up for them and then goes beyond anything I could ever imagine or dream.  This isn’t something I HAVE to do, He could’ve sent someone else…but He CHOSE me, and this is what I GET to do!

And so I sit overwhelmed by His love and grace and I say again…”I can’t believe I get to do this…”